oursin: Photograph of Stella Gibbons, overwritten IM IN UR WOODSHED SEEING SOMETHIN NASTY (woodshed)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-07 02:44 pm

So much WTF

This was posted over at [community profile] agonyaunt but I see the post is locked so not linking there. It's I was asked to provide proof that I wasn’t involved with my husband’s death" (second one down here at Ask A Manager):

I woke up next to my husband in May and found he was dead. I am a teacher in training and the university I go to is well aware of the situation. I have a tattoo on my neck which is the last message he wrote to me, and one day a colleague at work said, “Do you have your name on your neck?” I explained the situation.
Last Friday I was pulled into a room by myself with no warning and asked if I had a letter from the police clearing me of his death. I was told I had overshared at work, and due to the nature of the death (he was only 49 and died unexpectedly) they would like to see a letter from the police clearing me of any wrongdoing. I became extremely upset, and told her I wouldn’t go any further than this unless HR was there to document the conversation and take notes. She then followed me into the car park and asked me not to leave as she “didn’t want me to leave like this.” I told her I was too upset to talk and she still asked me to stay.
I’m only three weeks into my course and am terrified they will look for any reason to throw me off. Am I making a mountain out of a molehill?

Somebody asks about her tattoo, she responds, and then (this person or somebody else) says she's 'overshared at work'. What.

Why even mention the police? One assumes a doctor was involved and provided a certificate that it was a natural death. These happen. At much younger ages than 49.

(And ugh at the pursuing upset person.)

In a former former workplace the I think under 30 husband of a colleague died very unexpectedly of an asthma attack. Our sympathy was somewhat limited by the fact that she was having an affair with a colleague and was visibly ungriefstricken, but we didn't go around muttering 'she done 'im in' rather than making bitchy remarks about merry widows.

There was the famed fitness guru who dropped dead during a marathon.

There was some instance I think I commented on when scandalmongering tabloid journo was trying to drum up a case that some gay celeb had died in Sex Orgy because fit young men don't just drop dead, whereas in fact there are known syndromes that cause that.

But perish the thort that this should stop somebody who fancies themself - well, NOT Miss Marple, would Miss Marple have been anything like so crude if she had the slightest suspicion?

oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-07 09:30 am

(no subject)

Happy birthday, [personal profile] liadnan!
oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-06 04:15 pm

Ponderings

I observed over the weekend woezering about universities introducing courses teaching students how to read the books on their courses; that is, the courses in e.g. EngLit, that they signed up for and presumably knew would involve reading texts of various kinds? And instead of being Brigadier Disgusted-Hedjog of Tunbridge Wells, 'In my day we were doing C18th novels for A-levels [true]', I observed, when looking this up, that round about the same time last year there was the same round of woe unto this generation which do not rede ye bookz.

So my scepticism, she is considerable.

I suspect there have been allotropes of this one since Ye Classix were no longer the essentials for a degree/when EngLit became an actual degree subject/when philology and Anglo-Saxon were no longer compulsory/NOVELS! they are going to uni to read NOVELS!!! Sivilizashun B DED!!!!

Okay, possibly thick little Tarquin & Lucretia who got in through PULL may be astonished at having to read big fat books but in these days, and with the general attack on the humanities, I have to suppose that anyone who turns up with the intention of doing an English degree know what's in store.

***

So, we have had a woman Archbishop of Canterbury.

Has anyone - I haven't seen it anywhere yet - remarked on the SYMBOLISM, in the present parlous state of the Anglican communion over various abuse scandals, that her background is in A Healing Profession?

***

There are a lot of reasons why I am glad I am of the generation I am, and one of them is Having Missed Out on this sort of thing: risking our health in the name of beauty is totally normalised.

***

And today I got vaxxed.

oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-06 09:32 am

(no subject)

Happy birthday, [personal profile] kilerkki and [personal profile] supergee!
soc_puppet: Two girls in highschool uniform staring in awe; their hands are pressed together, and imaginary roses are blooming behind them. Above them is a crude drawing of an umbrella topped with a heart and the words, "A happy ending". (A happy ending)
Socchan ([personal profile] soc_puppet) wrote2025-10-05 09:23 pm
Entry tags:

Original Drabble: Surrender

Fandom: Original fiction (Avery and Zeek/Mershark Madness)
Summary: Avery is beginning to regret letting Zeek watch Earth pirate movies with him
Mirrors: On the original meme
Wordcount: 100
Ships: Avery/Zeek
Notes: For the prompt "Pirates" on [personal profile] ao3_isdown
Fic: Surrender )
oursin: Frontispiece from C17th household manual (Accomplisht Lady)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-05 07:08 pm
Entry tags:

Culinary

Last week's bread had a mould episode, chiz, so I made a loaf of Dove's Farm Organic Seedhouse Bread Flour, crust sprung a bit while baking, I think due to age of yeast, but otherwise okay.

Friday night supper, penne with sauce of roasted red peppers in brine whizzed in blender + chopped Calabrian salami.

Saturday breakfast rolls: brown grated apple, strong brown flour, maple syrup (also new batch of yeast): v nice.

Today's lunch: tempeh stirfried with sugar snap peas and a sauce of soy sauce, maple syrup, rice wine vinegar, sesame oil, cornflour mixed in water, crushed garlic and minced ginger: am not sure the tempeh was supposed to crumble like that during cooking?? served with sticky rice with lime leaves and chicory quartered, healthygrilled in pumpkinseed oil and splashed with lemon and lime balsamic vinegar.

oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-05 01:02 pm

(no subject)

Happy birthday, [personal profile] foxinsand!
oursin: Brush the wandering hedgehog dancing in his new coat (Brush the wandering hedgehog dancing)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-04 04:33 pm

Surprise Birthday Brahms!

When I turned on my clock radio - which I do on Saturdays to ensure that the time is co-ordinating with the radio time-signal - Radio 3 was playing the finale to Brahms Violin Concerto.

Joy!

Well, this has been an up and downy year as ever, but I am beginning to poke my nose out of my hole. I am still Doing Stuff, even if various projects seem to have got bogged down (not just on my side ahem ahem).

Anyway, in accordance with tradition, I pass round virtual rich dark gingerbread (and also gluten-free, diabetic-friendly, etc, versions), sanitive madeira (eschewing Duke of Clarence jokes) and other beverages of choice, and lift a glass to dr rdrz.

soc_puppet: Two girls in highschool uniform staring in awe; their hands are pressed together, and imaginary roses are blooming behind them. Above them is a crude drawing of an umbrella topped with a heart and the words, "A happy ending". (I ship it)
Socchan ([personal profile] soc_puppet) wrote2025-10-03 11:37 pm
Entry tags:

Shipping Meme

Shamelessly stolen from this post by [tumblr.com profile] human_otp_prompt_generator:

Silly Competitive Scenarios for Your OTP

They compete to see who can:

1. Give the other the most surprise hugs/kisses
2. Make the best meal for the other person
3. Go the longest without touching the other person
4. Buy the best gift for the other person with the least amount of money
5. Stay cuddled the before they have to get up
6. Stay awake the longest during movie night
7. Leave the most hickeys on the other person
8. Answer the most questions about the other person correctly
9. Outdo the other person on celebrating their mutual friend's birthday
10. Do the most daring dares during Truth or Dare
11. Tell the most embarrassing truths during Truth or Dare
12. Find out if they're right about some insignificant topic
13. Write the best poem or song about the other person
14. Win at a sport or game
15. Come up with more compliments about the other person

Responses for BingQiu (plus one BingYuan) )

I plan to come back and do this for Avery and Zeek as well, but this is who we get today!
oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-03 02:56 pm

Omniumgatherum

In case this has passed dr rdrz by, it is now possible for ordinary people to register for access to JSTOR's massive collection of scholarly resources.

***

This month's freebie from the University of Chicago Press is Courtenay Raia, The New Prometheans: Faith, Science, and the Supernatural Mind in the Victorian Fin de Siècle on psychical research.

***

Okay, I know I was going off at people getting all up in the woowoo about the Pill, but this is a bit grim about Depo-Provera: Pfizer sued in US over contraceptive that women say caused brain tumours. I was raising my eyebrows at this:

Pfizer argues that it tried to have a tumour warning attached to the drug’s label but this was rejected by the US regulator, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). The company said in its court filings: “This is a clear pre-emption case because FDA expressly barred Pfizer from adding a warning about meningioma risk, which plaintiffs say state law required.”

and going hmmm, because there was a huge furore in the 70s in the UK about Depo-Provera and what sections of the population were actually being put on it, i.e. there was a whole ethnicity/discrimination pattern going on, and I would not be entirely astonished to find out that there were programmes in certain US states which were maybe no longer sterilising 'the unfit' (though I'm not sure I'd bet good money on it) but blithely applying long-acting hormonal contraception instead.

***

And also in the realm of reproductive control: Of embryos and vaccines: If you REALLY want to protect the unborn... on rubella. Abortion historian notes that one reason (apart from thalidomide) for resurgence of abortion activism in UK in early 60s had been a German measles epidemic.... Also recall that my sister - who like me was not of a generation that routinely got this vaccine in childhood - when she fell pregnant with her first getting tested in the antenatal clinic to see if she needed to get the jab stat (in fact, she had high level of antibodies, so maybe we'd all had German measles among all our other many childhood ailments and barely noticed....)

***

Something more agreeable: the Royal School of Needlework's Stitch Bank:

RSN Stitch Bank is a free resource designed to preserve the art of hand embroidery through digitally conserving and showcasing the wide variety of the world’s embroidery stitches and the ways in which they have been used in different cultures and times. Now containing over 500 stitches, each stitch entry contains information about its history, use and structure as well as a step-by-step method with photographs, illustrations and video.

***

Asking good questions is harder than giving great answers: this so resonated with my experience as an archivist: 'often when people ask for help or information, what they ask for isn't what they actually want'.

***

Many years ago I used to go to a restaurant- Le Bistingo in South Ken, as I recall - that had a cartoon pinned on the wall depicting a chef bodily ejecting a diner. Waiter to observers: 'He Attempted To Add Salt'. This was rather my reaction to this particularly WTF 'You Be The Judge': Should my partner stop hankering after salt and pepper shakers?

Why do you need salt and pepper on the table, haven't you seasoned the food adequately? (oh, and btw, Gene, as a comment remarks, salt has naturally antiseptic properties*).

*I remember some historical drama of Ye Medeevles on the telly in my youth about dousing somebody's flogged back in salt water (?or rubbing it with salt) to stop it festering.

oursin: Brush the Wandering Hedgehog by the fire (Default)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-03 09:46 am

(no subject)

Happy birthday, [personal profile] quartzpebble!
oursin: The stylised map of the London Underground, overwritten with Tired of London? Tired of Life! (Tired of London? Tired of Life!)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-02 06:16 pm

Going a-bloomsburying

So yestere'en there was a get-together for the Fellows of the institution I have had the honour to be award a Fellowship of, so I thought I ought to Make The Effort and turn up at least for a little bit.

So I trotted off, and in spite of some hitches with the Tube (several trains going to the wrong branch) got to the right stop, and lo, the Scientologists are still infesting Tottenham Court Road, what is this thing that this thing is?

So I crossed the road, going, surely the traffic flow used to be one-way? Confusing.

And went down a side-street, and came to this lovely and surprising thing, which I am sure wasn't there last time I was in these parts, early in 2020:

Alfred Place Gardens

and was charmed.

Then on to venue, where everything seems same as it ever was.

Hearing aids still not optimum in room full of overlapping conversations: but I did manage to have some fairly coherent conversations, including one with old academic acquaintance who was most gratifyingly complimentary about The Biography, all these years later.

So I think a win, even if I did suppose that this event would also include some admin stuff relating to Fellowship, which it didn't.

thawrecka: (Bleach)
Cher (TW) ([personal profile] thawrecka) wrote2025-10-02 07:36 pm
Entry tags:

Anime watching roundup

The seasons of both The Summer Hikaru Died and Kaiju no 8 both ended on the weekend, and while the former was more satisfying than the latter, I had a pretty good time with both.

The cliffhanger Kaiju no 8 ended on feels less satisfying than last season's - feel less like an actual cliffhanger and more like just stopping the story in the middle of a fight - but I'm looking forward to season 3 if/when that arrives. The beginning of the season had a bit of a lull with the bunch of new characters I had yet to care about, but ever since Kafka fighting Isao it's been great, building and building emotionally. I wouldn't say I'm in the fandom, which seems to be composed mostly of teenagers super hot for Hoshino and his bowl cut writing copious amounts of readerfic, but I am writing fic of one kind and considering fic of another, and contemplating buying merch when I get to Tokyo.

The Summer Hikaru Died's season ender had a great emotional moment, and I'm excited that it's been renewed for another season (whenever that will arrive! I'm willing to wait). A lot of people who've read the manga seem to like the anime adaptation more, so I'm not sure whether to read the manga or just wait for the next season... The theme song is also stuck in my head, so there's that.

With regard to Bleach I finished the old anime series, sped my way through the anime movies, and have now got on to the Thousand Year Blood War anime. So I can slow down now, LOL. I actually think the Fullbring arc might be better in the anime. The animation towards the end of the old anime is kind of stiff (a lot of nothing moving but people's hair), but the pacing of the emotional backstory for the Fullbringers spread through the arc is better, and I like how it captures that slow quiet heavyness of Ichigo without his powers, that feeling like he's underwater and just pretending everything's fine. I also like how small and petty everyone in X-Cution ends up feeling; that honestly makes me have more sympathy for the characters than less. It's an arc that's really grown on me! I'm still disappointed it didn't make more use of Chad, but it's a great arc if you're emotionally invested in Ichigo & Ishida's friendship, as I am.

I do feel a little disappointed the old anime didn't have more Hueco Mundo filler, though. I think that would have been a great way to get deeper into the arrancar leftover after Aizen, who are relevant in the last arc after all...

My verdict on the movies: Eh, they're okay. They're basically filler arcs but shorter. I think the first two are the best, and the last one is the messiest with the highest highs and lowest lows. The third film feels like an interesting idea rendered in the least interesting way possible (I also feel like it's catering to the Ichigo/Rukia shippers, whereas the fourth has fanservice for Ichigo/Orihime shippers instead). The idea that without memories of Rukia Renji would forget he has bankai is interesting! So is the idea that Byakuya would believe Ichigo about a Rukia he doesn't remember because Ichigo mentions Hisana! But the execution is, eh, whatever.

Anyway, I'm not far into the TYBW anime yet but it's so much prettier than the old anime and I'm really vibing it. The last arc of Bleach is all over the place but there are parts I really enjoy that I'm excited to get to. It does still have some of that hair blowing in the wind so you won't realise it's otherwise a still image stuff 🤣 and way more of the hollows politely waiting to fight while someone monologues than I'd like, but still! I'm not far in but I'm excited and having fun! I can't wait to see Ishida suffer 🩵🩵🩵
rydra_wong: Lee Miller photo showing two women wearing metal fire masks in England during WWII. (Default)
rydra_wong ([personal profile] rydra_wong) wrote2025-10-02 08:16 am

Okay, this is very cool

Guardian: Nearly 100 years after her death, Oxford’s first female Indigenous scholar honoured

Reading the lost diary of the first indigenous woman to study at Oxford (by her descendant June Northcroft Grant, who accepted Papakura's MPhil certificate at the ceremony)

What a cool person and fascinating life; really interesting and impressive to see someone succeeding in doing academic scholarship on an Indigenous group from within that group, in that time period.
rydra_wong: Lee Miller photo showing two women wearing metal fire masks in England during WWII. (Default)
rydra_wong ([personal profile] rydra_wong) wrote2025-10-02 08:14 am
Entry tags:

OH SHIT IT'S HAPPENING

Someone's finally cast Francesca Mills as Ophelia:

https://www.theguardian.com/stage/gallery/2025/oct/01/hamlet-national-theatre-hiran-abeysekera-shakespeare-in-pictures

Which I have been saying should happen for six years, since seeing her in Barrie Rutter's Two Noble Kinsmen as the Jailer's Daughter (a role which I described as "semi-comic shitty-first-draft Ophelia"). Also Juliet now please, casting directors.
oursin: Photograph of small impressionistic metal figurine seated reading a book (Reader)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-10-01 08:26 pm

Wednesday went out and was academically social

What I read

Finished The Literary Life of Rebecca West, felt a bit meh about it.

Also finished The Military Philosophers, which is more of Nick Jenkins being in the backwaters of the War while other people die in theatres of war or he remembers dead people. Isobel (wife) actually got to be on stage and have a few lines.

Then, largely because there had been some discussion on [personal profile] troisoiseaux's DW about his works, picked up Dick Francis, Longshot (1990), as it happened to be in a conveniently accessible spot on my shelves; and then went straight on to Come To Grief (this features Sid Halley, who is I think the nearest Francis came to a series protag) (1995); To the Hilt (1996); and 10lb Penalty (1997), which were adjacent. This kind of back to back read really shows up an author's recurrent tropes (quite apart from the hosses and the hero getting painfully done over), like, the mostly quasi-father-son relationships, the quietly competent women minor characters etc etc. The last of this run was the weakest - it's a bit odd, to say the least, to have a plot which is all about politics and Parliamentary ambitions which is rather, um, coy, about actual political allegiances. Francis is very more-ish, though. Interesting that these do not all of them bring things to a tidy conclusion. (I wonder if this is the sort of thing that disappoints the once-a-year on the beach reader?)

Preordered and turned up yesterday, JA Jance, The Girl from Devil's Lake (Joanna Brady, #21) (2025), which, alas, does one of my least favourite crime novel tropes: serial killer with substantial portions of narrative being in their POV.

On the go

Have just picked up, because I felt like it, okay? Rebecca West, This Real Night (1984)

Up next

No idea.

rachelmanija: (Books: old)
rachelmanija ([personal profile] rachelmanija) wrote2025-10-01 11:14 pm

Out of Air, by Rachel Reiss



Just in terms of the premise, this is The Secret History meets Shadow Divers: a poor girl scuba diver falls in with a group of rich kid scuba divers, and they end up bound together by a shared deadly secret. There's other works it also reminded of, again just in terms of the premise, which are more spoilery: Read more... )

In the present timeline, Phoebe aka "Phibs," a poor aspiring underwater photographer, discovers a hidden underwater cave while on a diving trip with her four rich best friends, Gabriel (hot boy she likes), Will (Gabriel's fraternal twin, a joker), Lani (lost three fingers in past timeline, now afraid to dive), and Isabel (Lani's girlfriend). That is all the characterization Phibs's friends get, though Phibs herself gets a little bit more, or at least more backstory: she's the sole caretaker of her grandmother with dementia, and the women in her family have a possibly uncanny knack for finding things.

In the past timeline, Phibs finds five gold coins via the family knack, and something happens that led to Lani losing fingers and someone dying. In the present, Phibs finds a beautiful underwater cave with an air pocket. She and Gabriel rest and kiss in the air pocket... and then learn that there's a legend saying bad things happen to people who breathe the air in the cave. It seems to be true, as deeply creepy things begin happening to their bodies...

The plot and premise are great, and the diving and body horror/transformation scenes are really well-done. Reiss is a professional scuba diver, and you can tell. But the pacing feels a bit abrupt and choppy, which is not helped by the dual timelines cutting between the past and present, so that events that actually are set up still sometimes feel like they come out of the blue. I had a hard time figuring out the geography of anywhere that wasn't underwater, which is not a common complaint I have about books - for instance, I wasn't sure for most of the book whether the island base in the present storyline was a tiny island with only one house on it, or a large one with a town. And of course there's the mostly-nonexistent characterization, which is really the biggest problem with the book. If this had actual characters rather than "hot boy" and "Lani's girlfriend," it would have been so good.

I didn't mind that nothing is explained about what's actually up with the cave and Phibs's family knack, but in case you would mind: nothing is explained. I did enjoy reading the book but more attention to character and taking things slower could have made it excellent rather than just an enjoyable read with some standout elements.
rachelmanija: (Books: old)
rachelmanija ([personal profile] rachelmanija) wrote2025-10-01 06:44 am

The Bewitching & Mexican Gothic, by Silvia Moreno-Garcia



Three timelines intertwine, connected by witches and women. A grad student in Massachusetts in the 1990s, whose grandmother had a run-in with a witch in the early 1900s in Mexico, researches the mysterious disappearance of a promising woman horror writer in the 1930s.

It's a very nicely constructed, gripping, enjoyable novel of good and evil magic, and women's persistence in the face of what seem to be impossible odds.

Content notes: Cat death.




What it says on the tin: a very gothic-y gothic, set in Mexico. Noemi is a bit of a shallow, selfish debutante in 1950s Mexico. But when she realizes that her cousin who married a wealthy older man may be in trouble in their lavish home in rural Mexico, Noemi sets out to rescue her. She promptly encounters every gothic trope ever, plus a really fun twist on the haunted house/ghost story.

It turns out that being a mean girl debutante used to getting her own way is exactly what's needed to survive this story. I had no end of fun with Noemi bluntly calling out the rule about no talking at dinner, demanding to know exactly what medical treatment her cousin was getting, and generally running roughshod over the creepy atmosphere. A very enjoyable book that I read in a single sitting.
oursin: Photograph of small impressionistic metal figurine seated reading a book (Reader)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-09-30 07:27 pm

I know that there are a vast array of readers out there, but....

I do feel, Lee Child, that this categorisation is a bit simple:

But I think it’s nuts that people think genre is easier than reaching a very small and reliable audience. Some good, middle-class Julian Barnes or Martin Amis reader, they don’t expect to be 100% satisfied with a book. They put it down and start the next one. When you’re a bestseller, you’ve got to satisfy the person that reads one book a year on the beach. If you leave him disappointed, he may never read another book.

(Quite apart from the weird class thing going on.)

Okay, I read a lot and I very very seldom expect to be 100% satisfied with a book, but the ones that ring the bell are all over the place. I won't say I expect to be satisfied by a book but you know, Middlemarch exists, Tam Lin exists, The Fountain Overflows exists, etc etc, I can always hope.

And what do we mean by being satisfied by a book anyway? I was in Slow Motion Trainwreck Relationship with a person who had some very weird stuff going on about reading and what they would or would not read and somehow being afraid of investing time in reading a book that might not be Right. It was not about satisfaction precisely, it was about having some internal template a book had to match.

Actually I suppose this rather went with making the occasional askance expressions and noises at the kind of things that I was reading, because I may not be entirely indiscriminate in what I read but I do have to be reading something and I will give quite a lot of things A Go.

I also wonder how one fits into the above paradigm people who do read a lot but want the exact same thing with just slight changes, which is also a market that bestsellers aim at, surely?

Also, are there literally people who only read one book a year when they're on holiday (and probably on the plane rather than the beach)?

On another paw (how many have I got up to?) there is Uncle Matthew in The Pursuit of Love who would never read anything (except for Country Life, presumably, if he found the chub-fuddler there) after the transcendant experience that was White Fang.

oursin: My photograph of Praire Buoy sculpture, Meadowbrook Park, Urbana, overwritten with Urgent, Phallic Look (urgent phallic)
oursin ([personal profile] oursin) wrote2025-09-29 09:58 am

Menz B Weeerd

I do not think these are healthy or useful ways to look at SEX. Notches on the bedpost was bad enough, or how many times per night they could Do It, but really, these are taking the whole thing to new levels.

My boyfriend sees sex as a competition he is losing. How can I change his mind?:

He feels like he doesn’t perform enough (he does) and worries he isn’t big enough (he is!). He grew up without a father – the father’s fault – and I wonder if this has something to do with it. How can I assist him to see sex as non-competitive?:
Response:I assume he doesn’t think he’s losing the competition with you, somehow, but with imagined manly foes, comparisons, symbols of everything he (imagines he) isn’t?

I suppose there isn't actually some scoreboard somewhere out there Rate My Manly Performance but I wouldn't entirely rule that out, alas.

Because of this: Sperm-racing investors blow $10 million on ‘seed round’ for sports venture:

Last weekend, Zhu flew to YouTuber David Dobrik’s slick white Los Angeles mansion, collected the sperm of three influencers, and injected it onto a small race track as a crowd gathered in the living room. The competitors — Harry Jowsey, Jason Nash, and Ilya Fedorovich — watched a video of their swimmers, overlaid with animated tadpoles, zoom to the finish line.

Apparently, 'Zhu insists he has a deeper, more profitable mission: to gamify health and build an empire around male fertility'.

Yeah, well, I'm over here going

a) tortoise and hare, and are those sprinters whooshing right past the ovum in their mad gallop?

b) bit of an assumption that they are actually, you know, viably fertile, which I don't think at all correlates with speed. Motility is one thing, having what it takes to fertilise that ovum is another (and haven't I read something somewhere about It Is The Ovum That Chooses? Heh.)

c) Mary Ellman's image in Thinking About Women: 'the activity of ova involves a daring and independence absent, in fact, from the activity of spermatozoa, which move in jostling masses, swarming out on signal like a crowd of commuters from the 5:15.